heidisaintjames

This is a gentle guide to help friends and family support parents who have lost their baby. When a baby dies, nothing makes sense anymore. How could something so pure and perfect not get the chance to live? To walk, to talk, to laugh? It isn’t fair. It will never feel fair. And no explanation will ever make it make sense. I am a parent who lost my daughter during delivery due to medical negligence. Everything changed in a matter of moments. My daughter began showing extreme signs of...

There are moments that divide your life into before and after. The day Heidi was born is where my life split in two. She was born on May 4th, 2024, at 3:27 in the morning. 39 weeks 21 inches long. 6 pounds, 15 ounces. Perfect in every way… and gone in the same breath that we met her. One second I was pushing, focused on bringing our baby into the world. We were at the finish line. Our car seat was already installed in the backseat, ready to bring our baby home. Then everything shifted. You...

When someone you love experiences pregnancy or infant loss, you may want to show up for them but feel unsure or unprepared. Sometimes, seeing or hearing about a baby after death brings up questions that feel uncomfortable or hard to ask. Having questions does not  mean you are insensitive. Not understanding does not  mean you care less. Learning what is normal can help you support grieving parents. Below are six common questions you might ask when you see a baby that has passed away. Why do...